This just popped in...

So I'm driving home from work and daycare...and it's one of those rare drives home when everything is nice and quiet (as opposed to the general shrieking that is usually coming from the devil precious angel in the backseat...punctuated by flying sippy cups and eerily realistic doll babies.) (I mean seriously...couldn't they make those things a little more cartoony?  I'm afraid someone is going to spot one in my backseat in some parking lot at the damn Target and call the cops because they think I've got a premie locked up in my Florida Easy Bake Oven (AKA "the car" for you Northerners...and for everyone else too...because I totally just thought of Florida Easy Bake Oven as a clever name for a car down here.  Get it?  Because it gets so hot?  Yeah...I'm good at this stuff)...and then the cops are going to come and break one of my windows and BIG GIANT MESS and TV NEWS CHANNEL and LIVE ON THE SCENE and who do you think will have to replace the damn window and get embarrassed to all hell when I hear them announce that there is a VW Rabbit with a fake melted baby in the backseat?  Yeah...me.)

(And that last set of parenthesis is a fairly accurate portrayal of the slippery slope known as my thought process.)

So anyways...driving + quiet + overly active brain having time to come up with little bits of delight instead of ideas on what to throw at soothe the baby with = wonderful pop in thoughts from no where.

If I could sing...and I definitely can't...who would I sound like?  Not who I would like to sound like...but who would I actually sound like.

And let me tell you...I've got an hour long drive home...so I had a lot of time to think about this.  And after weighing out all of my options...I came to this conclusion:

If I could sing, I think I'd sound like Bif Naked.  And damnit...I don't think that's such a bad thing...granted...no one has any clue who the hell Bif Naked is anymore...I'm still OK with that.

BUT THEN...I got home and had to listen to messages on my voicemail...and the baby got a hold of the phone and pushed the "completely fuck up phone" button...and I ended up having to hear my outgoing message.

SERIOUSLY?  I sound like a freaking preschool teacher!  A SOUTHERN preschool teacher!  

Ugh.

There goes my Bif Naked dreams.

So who would you sound like if you could sing?

Comments

[finefornow]

Hmm...I don't think I can even answer because I can't sing, at all, ever. All the famous people I know that can sing sound good, so I wouldn't want to offend them! :o)

[J.D.]

Peter Steele. Because I like the Munsters.

[brokemom]

Answering this question is like answering the question, "Who would you look like if you were naked?". And I just can't make a comparison. I'm sorry.