So someone out there is getting me good...real good. I'm embarrassed, puzzled, surprised, curious, and downright beside myself with how damn clever this prank is.
Someone signed me up for a year of Woman's Day Magazine.
Woman's Day Magazine. WOMAN'S DAY!!!
Like suddenly I'm some menopausal, divorced, then remarried, mindless/dead end career woman in her mid-forties with a couple of elementary school kids from my second marriage and a kid in college from my first and I must have a lot of credit card debt and just no clue as to how to lose that 25 pounds of fat baby weight that I've been carrying around for the last ten two years or what to make for dinner tonight. WOMEN'S DAY!
Woman's Day...of all the magazines that you could send someone as a prank...not exactly the first thing you would think of, huh? I would say the obvious would be gay porn...but that's just me (TAKE THAT GOOGLE...I SAID GAY PORN.)
So why do I think this is a prank? Well...one day a couple of months ago, I strolled over to my work mailbox and there it was...glossy and bright in the fluorescent lights with promises smeared all over it...lose 10 pounds in one week! Get organized today! Spicy up your marriage! It was disgustingly pathetic sitting there in my mail slot...just wrong and embarrassing...it's like that girl at the bar who already had too much makeup on and got way too drunk way too early in the evening...and now that she's already made out with a couple of guys...she's just too sloppy and depressing to be able to take seriously...especially with her lipstick smeared all over her teeth and her mascara running down her cheek. (Ok...maybe that analogy went wrong and off the deep end...I just mean that Woman's Day is generally for the ladies who have been around the block a couple of times. Just go with me here...I could have said, "Woman's Day is for women who have been rode hard for a couple of years and put away wet." But I didn't. I'm trying to class it up around here.)
I snatched it, rolled it, and stuck it under my arm...I made a beeline back to my desk and avoided eye contact at all costs. Partially hiding under my desk, I examined it carefully, perhaps it was supposed to go to someone else and it got put in my mailbox by mistake...but no...there it was...my name and my work address.
MY WORK ADDRESS...now that's just low...it's one thing to send me old lady magazines to my house...but to my work where everyone can see...that's bordering on cruel.
So that first month I chalked up to a fluke...but four issues later...I'm starting to think this person is just diabolical. I even called Woman's Day magazine and asked how and why did I keep getting these things every month. Apparently someone signed me up...paid for a full year...no...they couldn't tell me who this person was, so that I could "thank" them. The lady on the other end of the phone made the comment of, "Well someone must really like you out there...sending you a whole year's worth of the kind of advice today's woman needs!"
More like someone out there really knows how to fuck with me.
And yes...she actually said, "the kind of advice today's woman needs" it took everything I had in me not to vomit.
So kudos to whoever the mastermind is...you got me flummoxed good and proper...just hope that I don't find out who you are...otherwise prepare for an influx of gay porn, sucker.
LOVE this prank!
Posted by: Redsy | Tuesday, July 29, 2008 at 08:11 PM